now is a good time to panic

I took Kaiser for a quick walk last night and when I returned, I found a hugemangous roach on the floor. This is not unusual; Hawaii has roaches EVERYWHERE. The kind I saw last night on the floor is nicknamed a B52 because of how giant it is. That is not such a big deal. All roaches are icky and should be exterminated. The problem is that is was IN THE HOUSE. NO! Nonononononono!

For a moment we were frozen. I stared at the roach. The roach stared right back at me. I took a slooow step backwards. The roach continued staring at me. It was all ‘What, bitch? Bring it.’

That was all it took to get me in motion. I darted across the kitchen and wrenched open the cabinet under the sink. There was no Raid to be found so I grabbed an aerosol can of Lysol and shot a healthy stream at that bastard. 

It scuttled away under the stove while I shuddered. Was it my imagination or was the roach scuttling a bit crookedly? I’m sure the Lysol killed it, but if it didn’t… that’s the cleanest B52 on this damned island.