now is a good time to panic

my friend’s daughter
15 July 2012, 8:30 am
Filed under: nonsense | Tags: , ,

So my good friend has a daughter. Her father had better buy a shotgun while her brother learns how to fight… because this girl is STACKED. Not even a teenager yet and already has her mom’s banging body. Ridiculous. I have no idea what they are putting in our food these days, but there must be super-booty-growth-hormones all up in the school lunches. The last time this girl was in a bathing suit, her mom gestured to her, rolled her eyes and asked me ‘So please tell me what the hell I’m supposed to do with all this?’


This girl also extraordinarily self-possessed. You forget she’s even around. She never begs for attention, hassles you for no reason, or whines at you. She just kind of does her own thing, and it’s refreshing. The girl is addicted to Korean soap operas, for God’s sake. What pre-teen do you know that voluntarily watches soaps? She’s not even Asian!


Heaven help any children that I might have. If by some accidental glitch of nature I DO have any, though… I hope they turn out exactly like this freakily awesome kid.


2 Comments so far
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It always surprises me when I meet a relative of someone I know well, I look for a family resemblance, a speech pattern or quirky mannerism. I want to connect the two and verify how they have influenced each other; it’s a thing I do. So imagine my disappointment when I introduced a friend of mine to my sister and neither of them were interested in each other and barely made eye contact. Sometimes I wonder if all my siblings were switched at birth.

Comment by susan

Lol don’t you think it’s more likely that you were the one switched at birth? You’re the only artsy one in the bunch :)

Comment by kathelldorfer

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